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A STAINED HEART



To this very day, I refuse to have children. Most of the time, I cannot even leave my apartment, except to buy groceries or keep an occasional doctors appointment, which I dread.

I just cannot allow a man to touch me or see me undressed. Or anyone to see me naked, for that matter.

Oh, how horrible it was as a very young girl to have never had anything of your own to wear. Every single day of your life having to wear clothes and yes, even panties that had been worn and stained by another orphan girl the day before.

Now I am a full-grown woman and feeling like nothing more than an item. Remembering back in time when all us naked little girls were standing in a line at the orphanage exposing our private parts, which we are now holding open for the matron’s daily inspection. Oh God! Lord, why did you do this to me?

Name withheld



NOTE: I have tried to tell through my stories just how horrible the orphanage really was on children. I have tried, over and over and over to explain the damage that this has done to them as adults. Adults who are now unable to show love or affection toward others. Just how much damage ‘the little things’ can do. The things that we as adults think are not important. To show just how much damage can be caused by a child never having any privacy or what having to exchange your unclean, unwashed underwear can do to a little child.

If you are under the illusion that beating a child is what makes kids run out into a schoolyard and start shooting, you are badly mistaken.



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